I live my life like there’s no tomorrow
And all I’ve got I had to steal
Least I don’t need to beg or borrow
Yes, I’m livin’ at a pace that kills

“My god, King….THAT’S …THAT’S ROB T’S MUSIC~! We’ve haven’t seen him since he shut down his blog! And he is marching to the blog and BY GOD, he’s got a microphone!”

Don’t call it a comeback…this IS THE REEEEEEEEEEEEEEMIX~!

A lot has happened since you last saw lights in the Safe House.

Obama prevailed over Hillary. Sarah Palin. GTA IV. The Dark Knight. Banks crashing like old Windows machines and Wall Street going to hell in a handbasket. Rosser renamed to B. Hussein Rosser. And most of all, there’s a little thing called FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTBALL! These are desperate times. So I am officially suspending my suspension of the Safe House. That is right…the rarely tried…DOUBLE SUSPENSION. (I’d like to thank Stephen Colbert for this joke and being so awesome.)

So…what changed between now and April 1st…when I shut down, due to lack of time, and passion for blogging, among other things?

Well, not a whole heck of a lot, really. Sometimes you don’t know how much you miss something until you stop doing it. I’d drop Brett Favre’s name here, but at least I didn’t cry during my retirement speech. Also, I’d like to flash back to THIS CLASSIC SAFE HOUSE MOMENT! So if you’ll turn your attention to the WayBack Machine…

March 20, 2004:

***************This Has Been A Joke****************

This time, my blog was away much longer, and the effects are even being felt on Wall Street. Clearly, my blog is important to the fabric of our very space time continuum, kids. My unretirement is for the good…of America. Fuck yeah! America! The Greatest Nation on Earth! Also because Ori said I should unretire. So there…..

Alright, enough clowning, let’s get this party (re-)started…

FINALLY….

THE ROB…

HAS COME BACK…TO THE LAND OF BLOGGERY~!

I am doing well. Still training, have finished several classes and I’m pretty proud of how I am doing so far. It has been interesting. I am pretty good at the training side of the job…as it turns out, there is also some “management” portions to this platter. Those I’m still learning. Anyone who knows me (and chances are, if you’re reading this space, especially after my extended absence, you know me pretty well) knows I’m not exactly what you’d call …well, tactful. It turns out honesty is not always the best policy. Telling people the methods they’ve used for years are broken and crappy, even when it’s the truth, doesn’t go over too well when those people have six zeros in their paychecks.

We’ll see. Personally, I’d rather leave the politicking to Obama, McCain, and Palin and just speak my mind. But I also like keeping my job, so I’ll learn to play nice. We can hope, anyway.

Speaking of our presidential candidates…well, Letterman on McCain. Ahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. “Hey, John, I got a question. NEED A RIDE TO THE AIRPORT????!”

Obama 08: YES WE CAN. Is there a chance he’ll be like any other politician? Sure. But at least for the first time in a while, there is hope. Hopefully, not of the false variety. And all of the whinging on his abortion stance, remember, it’s not the President that makes abortion policy.

Palin: She’s cute. Credibility still a bit of a question…this TrooperGate thing is, too. On the bright side - if she becomes VP, never has there been a tailormade impersonator better than Tina Fey.

Gone but not forgotten since my last blog: Bernie Mac~! Paul Newman. And mostdef GEORGE CARLIN. To put it in the words of Jon Stewart, “People who make the world a better place need to stop dying.” Indeed. Godspeed.

The Dark Knight: What, you didn’t think I’d let THE movie of the summer go by without a review? Not even. The latest in the roving series of the Big Black Bat is the kinda-sequel to Batman Returns, in it’s own right a fairly underrated and well written piece of work. Heath Ledger was the Joker, just in case you’ve been under a rock for the last…ever, and he may just have earned himself a posthumous Oscar with this performance. Nothing wrong with Christian Bale, Maggie Gyllenhaal was used perfectly, and Aaron Eckhart would have stolen this movie himself as Two Face if not for Ledger’s final masterpiece. That being said….can’t call it the greatest movie ever. I mean, I won’t claim to be the worldest biggest comic geek or anything, but I’m pretty sure the Joker wasn’t blessed with super ESP, seeing as he managed to know pretty much where everyone was at all times and even things like which street out of 20 a truck would turn down so that it would run into an elaborate boobytrap. I loved the movie, but much like Die Hard, another series of enjoyable movies I love, plot holes you could drive a truck through. ****3/4 on the RVD scale.

Iron Man: Robert Downey Jr, millionaire playboy, Iron Man. He gets kidnapped, sees the impact of his weapons, grows a conscience, gets a (metallic) heart, cue conflict with Weapons Designing world. It was pretty good for what it was, which was a summer blockbuster action flick. Gwyneth Paltrow was pretty wooden as the love interest but (almost) redeems herself with a killer line near the start of the movie…outside of Downey Jr, can’t say there was anyone who really knocked it out of the park in this one. ****

GTAIV: Ten pounds of awesome in a five pound bag. Children, conservatives, and anyone not a fan of general mayhem need not apply. I’d give it six stars (which would be an appropriate rating!), but they TOOK OUT THE TANK. Which is well nigh unforgivable. How do you have a GTA game and not have the ability to roll around in a tank? That is horrible. And I’m not all that impressed with multiplayer mode, either, and in spite of both these glaring issues…..*****.

While I’m catching up to the backlog….RIP, Ingrid. My thoughts and prayers are with Deb and the extended family.

I’d talk about the Kiffin/Davis thing, but eh. What will happen will - hopefully whatever drama Davis comes up with doesn’t screw up the team, since they are improving vastly. Russell is getting better every week, McFadden is the real deal, and Fargas makes a good 1-2 punch when they are not hurt. It is too bad the one good receiver we got in the offseason (Drew Carter, who will be a star if he can stay healthy…mark my words) got smashed to the IR in preseason. We desperately need a good passblocker on the OL and a good receiver, if we can get those in the offseason, this team will contend. Oh, and let’s get rid of MeAngelo. I can tolerate Walker (grossly overpaid but at least has talent if he can work back to his ‘04 form), Wilson (serviceable), and even Tommy Kelly (good player - don’t get me wrong, they gave him about 60M too much, but a good player), but MeAngelo is a useless waste of space and air. We would be better off with Philip Buchanon (currently rotting in Houston) or even Chris Carr (stolen, brilliant pickup by the Titans).

And…it looks like the bailout bill just crashed and burned. Someone bail out the bailout bill! Seriously, can we pull Bush now? I mean, like in a blowout game when they bench the starting QB and let the second stringer finish the game…except in this case, that’d be Cheney, so I say we just swear whoever wins into office on November 15th.

Let’s review:

September 11th (after numerous intelligence briefings warning of an imminent Bin Laden attack in US)
Katrina
The “Mission Accomplished” speech in Iraq
The Iraq War in general
Wiretapping without warrants
Cheney shooting someone in the face
Wall Street falling apart like a cheap car
Oil companies making record profits while the foreclosure and jobless rates set record highs

Seriously…if this were a PPV match, Jim Ross would be screaming, “Will someone stop the damn Presidency? WITH GOD AS MY WITNESS, THE COUNTRY IS BROKEN IN HALF~!” But what do I know?

Until next time….this here Rob T!