Greetings, good people of Blog Nation.

-Butch is 29 yesterday! Happy birthday to the Rosser. I remember when he was jobless and girlfriendless and all of that back when we met and always thought he’d be in that place. Now he’s horrifying us with vanilla milkshake references and has *two* jobs. To paraphrase an idiot I once met at Jack in the Box, I AM A MIGHTY PROPHET. Speaking of the milkshake thing, I usually don’t speak about these type of things on the blog, but many a time over IM we have discussed the scary parallels between Rosser’s life and mine. It is with this in mind that I’m going to share the probably equally TMI bit that my most memorable encounter of the carnal variety for 2007 also involved a vanilla milkshake. My shake had M&Ms in it, though. Which makes it much awesomer. *evil grin*

Oh, the Mighty Prophet thing - hey, that’s a Jack story I haven’t told yet. Not really much of a story, just we hired this guy at Jack (I didn’t hire him, thank God) named Samuel and he was a religious guy, and also possibly mentally ill. For these reasons, he would scream at random, “I AM A MIGHTY PROPHET!” Which led to some strange looks from customers, and some interesting situations at the store. I think Ori would have probably beat him up with a mini-blind or something.

The last day Samuel worked there, he was heckling this other employee, Bengali guy named Shumon. And I had to stop Shumon from trying to beat the Baby Jesus out of Samuel and then Samuel told us that God was telling him it was time to move on, and with one last “I AM A MIGHTY PROPHET”, he left. It’s also worth noting that Michelle yelled at his retreating back, “You are a MIGHTY IDIOT.” to which I laughed quite a bit.

Anyway, the last 10 years (almost a decade now! Hard to believe it’s been that long) have been fun. Head up, check in hand. That’s how it always goes.

-Speaking of birthdays, Candice had a birthday, too, since my last post. Happy belated birthday. She’s 26. Ah, to be 26 again…:)

-The Basketball wrecked his car. And got a Honda. Kinda like Candice did, except she didn’t wreck her car. Although given the state of what I lovingly called “The Decepticon” (it was a 04 Cavalier - it was a piece of monkey crap), it probably would have been a mercy killing had it been wrecked.

-New messageboard, coming soon to a blog near you? Stay tuned. (No, not my blog).

-Whatever happened to Libby, I wonder? Hadn’t seen her in a bit. And the entire year of 2007’s been deleted from the blog. I suppose everyone’s reaction to a bad year is different.

-Giants 17, Patsies 14. Ahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahaahahahahaha. I had been rooting against the Patsies all year. But about three weeks ago, I wondered….wouldn’t the best ending be for them to get to the Super Bowl, then lose? I know how agonizing that is (and somewhere, Rich Gannon adopts the Rich Gannon scowl, one last time…) and they weren’t even 18-0 at the time. I didn’t get on the blog to officially make a pick, but I did pick the Giants. Can’t count it on the record, leaving me 5-5 for the playoffs. By far, my worst finish predicting playoffs ever. Blaaah.

Anyway, to see the Patriots get the proverbial Karma-ic kick in the nuts after going 18-0 and almost getting there….too sweet.

-I’m backing Obama at this point, for anyone who might care what my political feelings are. I like McCain, but policy wise, he’d be a slightly more intelligent Bush with a conscience. Mind you, that’s a vast improvement over Bush, but still. Romney, Huckabee…bluargh. And don’t even get me started on Hillary. I think I’d rather see a piece of road gravel be elected president.

-The writer’s strike might be over! Huzzah. Jack Bauer, a lonely nation turns it eye to you….

By Rob, February 10, 2008, 5:16 pm o'clock

Actual tech email at work I just got:

“Why does other carriers have ducks quacking and real turkeys gobbling, but not Sprint?”

Maybe *this* is why we are losing customers. The lack of real turkey gobbling ringtones!

(And yes, this guy was actually seriously asking this question. As far as I can tell. It’s not quite “I was told I can send a fax through this phone!” but ……it’s up there.)

By Rob, January 23, 2008, 10:09 am o'clock

Football: Wow, did I get toasted in the divisionals. 1-3 to ensure my worst finish picking a playoff ever. Ouch. Let’s pass on the super details - NE and GB will advance to the Bowl To Rule Them All.

New Car~!: It’s a 2008 Aveo - I’m a computer geek, so it’s approps I would get an updated version of the same car with nifty new features.

Let’s hope this one lives to 2009.

Job Drama: In case anyone was worried about all the press about Sprint layoffs (I see JB even linked one of the articles), my job would seem to be fairly safe. This will target mostly people at the old Nextel headquarters in Reston, VA, and supervisors and support staff. People like myself that directly help customers (customer-facing agents, as we call them in The Biz) are the safest from layoffs.

Hey Jim Mora, what’s that about layoffs?

LAYOFFS? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? DON’T TALK ABOUT…LAYOFFS!

*smirk* Sorry, couldn’t resist.

Of course, while I might be safe from layoffs, they just introduced a “zero tolerance” policy. Now, we get rated on calls randomly by customer surveys (CSAT), much like stores have mystery shoppers or restaurants have mystery guests. Word has it that this zero tolerance policy means that if a customer rates you horribly on the CSAT, that’s auto termination.

My CSAT scores have always been excellent (in fact, I reeled off 8 months in a row of 100% issue resolved scores at one point in late 2006-mid 2007), but this is a horribly dumb idea that makes me very nervous and sounds way too close to “free pass to get rid of whoever we want”. Even I get the customer that is pissed off at the world because of what the last 9 people did and who rate us down not because of anything we did, but because they’re mad at the company. Everyone does, because, reality, customer service, not our best gig. Not yet.

What’s worse than both of those: Sprint announced that it lost 683,000 net post paid subscribers in 4Q of last year. That means, even with all the new people joining and new account in the Christmas shopping season, when we sell a lot of phones and new lines, we still lost over half a million customers. That’s a pretty troubling number and it means that net, we lost more than a million customers last year.

The sad thing is that really, there’s no pretty face to put on that. I cringe like anyone else when I have to tell Butch or Mom to call into Customer Care, even if they can call Employee Accounts, which are a few notches about the normal Care agents. I see horror stories every day and have to admit that we screwed up every day.

The good news is that we now have a CEO who has a long proven history of being a winner in telcom. We also have several very good things coming in 2008 (WiMAX being a big one - stay tuned. http://www.xohm.com ). We did a lot of good things in customer care in 2007 that we can build on. There are still so many things that need fixing, but I have hope that we can reverse the trends.

We shall see.

Candice: Still a furby and a Goober. She’s on vacation in Hot Springs, AK. Must be nice!

Deb: Illinois Fats. Heh. Where does he rank with the infamous California Fats? You seem to have horrible luck with the weight-challenged. I better keep my goal of losing weight! Seriously speaking, sometimes, over time, people change. I’ve been very lucky to find a number of very loyal longtime friends over the time I’ve been online and otherwise. Sadly, there is a premium on loyalty - in today’s world, 95% of the world only cares about one thing - Number One. Say, speaking of the new goal…

The New Purpose: I should probably buy a scale or something to measure my progress. But sodas have become almost non-existent (I had DP when having lunch with Joan, prior to Xmas), and whole wheat has been the bread since December. I’ve also cut down on milk, subbing in Orange Strawberry Banana juice (I know, it sounds awful, but it’s good stuff). This was an exciting segment, wasn’t it?

Speaking of exciting: 5 possessions, 5 punts. NE-SD is a clunker so far….and just as I was typing that, Brady threw a pick to Jammer. Uh oh…NE doesn’t seem to have much killer instinct today.

Sweet Georgia Brown: Say what you will about Georgia Frontiere’s past (and many have, very ugly-like, I guess respect for the dead is another thing that’s a dying trend): it’s clear from the reactions of people in St. Louis that she had a huge impact on the city and the community in her hometown. And regardless of what level of credit, if any, you want to give her for it, the team did manage two Lombardi trips and 1 trophy under her watch. RIP.

Clemens: That third ear and tractor pulling quote was almost worth all the stupidity. Almost. Bluargh.

Enjoy your weekend! Talk at ya later.

By Rob, January 20, 2008, 2:41 pm o'clock

Got a new car! Yay! More on that later.

Well, 3-1 for the first round. Only tripped up on Washington-Seattle. Backing a 36-year old career backup QB on the road. Insanity. Baaah. We’re gonna spice the picks up a bit this time out.

Dallas over NY Giants - yeah, yeah, Romo spent a weekend banging Jessica Simpson in Mexico, so what? Say it with me: SHUT THE FUCK UP TERRY BRADSHAW. Geez. All signs point to TO playing and Dallas pulling off the rarely seen hat trick.

Counterpoint: Gotta say, though, if there’s an upset to be had in Divisional Weekend, this is it, with how the Giants have been playing and the way Dallas limped into the playoffs. If Romo starts slow like he has the last few games, T.O isn’t 100 percent, and the Giants come out firing like they did the last few games, Dallas could be in serious trouble. (To say nothing of Romo - if they lose this game after all that stirfry Bradshaw raised up, he’s going to have millions of Dallas fan demanding he dump his girlfriend. The sad thing is, I’m only half kidding on that one.)

Seattle over Green Bay - I picked emotion over talent on paper last week with Washington. There’s only so far the Brett Favre nostalgia run will get you. A suspect running game and a defense poor against the pass means this should be a shootout between Favre and Hasslesuck. And that’s a game Seattle will win. Unless it goes into OT and Hasslesuck says something stupid again. That would grandly amuse me.

Counterpoint: Ancient or not, he’s still Brett Favre. And as long as he doesn’t get carted off with 4 or 5 broken limbs, the Packers will have a fighting chances at playing next week for a chance to reclaim the trophy named after their legendary coach. This one should be a good game.

The Cobra Kai over the Jags - sorry, as much as I’d love to hope for Belicheck and crew to suffer the kick in the nuts that a one and done would be after 16-0, there’s only one team that’s gonna stop the Patriots in the AFC. And unfortunately for Jack Del Rio and crew, that team doesn’t have an animal on it’s helmet. The Jags blew an 18 point lead, and (save for an undetected hold on 4th and 2) almost giftwrapped that game for Pittsburgh. Also, much has been made of Garrard’s 3 INTs over the regular season - and to those people, I have three words for you: “No Mistake” Jake, circa 2006.

Counterpoint: The Jags have the running game to wear down the Patriot’s defense, the D-Line to put pressure on Brady, and a game manager in Garrard that to this point has done pretty well at avoiding the turnovers that the Patriots feed on. If a few calls go the Jags way and MoJo Drew gets loose for a few huge plays, the Jags have a shot at emulating Denver-NE of a few years ago.

Colts over Norv Turner’s Overdrive - bye, Norv! Thank you for coming! Hmmm. Peyton Manning at home, or Phillip Rivers on the road with Norv Turner coaching him and probably no Gates. Lemme think about that one for a second……

Counterpoint: LDT is still putting on a Charger uniform. He could always put on his Superman cape and reel off a 40 carrys, 250 yd, 3 TD performance. And they could always pull a Carson Palmer on Peyton Manning.

More on the new car~! and other stuff later on.

By Rob, January 11, 2008, 9:41 pm o'clock

See the post below this one for the adventure where I wrecked and totaled my car (also doubling as the 2**7 recap post).

Washington over Hasslesuck’s Marching Band - Collins and the Skins are on a singular mission and with ST, are this year’s Emotional Rollercoaster Team (replacing the Katrina-recovered Saints of 2007). On the other end, you have a Seattle team that Hasslebeck’s carried and whose closest divisional challenge was…..THE CARDINALS. Seattle is this year’s version of the 2005 Patriots - a mediocre team that coasted to a division win pretty much by default and got exposed by No Mistake Jake (LOL) and the Broncos in the playoffs. With Shaun Alexander’s stock value dropping faster than Roger Clemens’ HOF hopes, Hasslesuck and his crew of Butterfinger WRs are going to have to get it done themselves and that’s gonna be tough without a running game to keep Washington’s good D honest. Also, Seattle punched the Skins out of the playoffs last time the Skins made it, so throw in the revenge factor as well.

Giants over Tampa - Giants injured themselves, Eli on the road. Blah, blah, blah. The Giants are fired up, they’re a much better road team than home team, and Tampa, well, all the credit in the world to Gruden, because this has got to be among the worst #3 teams ever. Seriously, what does this team have besides an aging Garcia and a good rookie RB in Graham? The equally ancient Joey Galloway? The still good-but-aging-in-dog years Ronde Barber and Brooks? This one really could go either way, but I think Eli gets his first playoff win here.

Chargers over VY Redefining the Sophomore Slump: Eh. As reluctant as I am to back Norv Turner in any game that means anything, the Chargers are going to get the job done here, more than likely in spite of Turner rather than because. Tennessee has a good D, but Young needs some WRs badly. Nothing against Justin Gage, who will be a very good WR likely with a few more years, and Young’s college buddy Bo Sciafe has made a decent outlet option at TE, but Moulds and the other miscreants that dress at flanker have just been terrible this year, a huge part of the reason Tennessee limped into the playoffs against an disinterested Indy team. Oh, and the Titan special teams have ranged from blah to cover-your-eyes bad. Sproles might pick up a return TD in this game.

Jags over Steelers - it’s funny that a team who’s 2006 storybook run to the Bowl centered around it’s running back (the retiring Bus - The Fumble Heard Round Indy, etc) once again is defined by it’s running back. Unfortunately for the Steelers, this time around the story is that Willie Parker’s done and the Steelers are likely to be in bad weather up in The Town Justin Shapiro Built. If the Steelers can find a running game in their cupboard, they have a fighting chance - if not, the Jags D is going to have (Rothesli)burgers for Saturday night dinner.

In other news, I might have a new car secured. More on that as news develops.

By Rob, January 5, 2008, 1:13 am o'clock

You know, I had a bit of a 2007 recap post prepared. Even had a draft written up with some notes here. I was going to finish that when I got back to Kansas from my Xmas vacation on the 27th.

So what happened?

Remember this? My new car.

Well, while I survived 2007 and lived to tell the tale, sadly, my car will not be joining us in 2008. RIP My Aveo (March 10th, 2007 - December 27th, 2007).

I was coming home on the Kansas Turnpike. Driving through scenic, crime-free Wichita, KS, listening to music on my phone via a handsfree headset, driving safely (ie at the speed limit - it was raining and all), wearing my seatbelt, all alone on the road at that moment along mile marker 71…

And suddenly, I’m spinning. I remember looking up and seeing my battery light on and thinking that I had stalled. I do a complete 360 two or three times while my heart leaps out of my chest and I try to somehow regain control…

Then….CRASH! That would be me catching the guardrail on the right side with my left wheel and caroming off of said rail like a pinball.

Then I’m spinning in the road again…and somehow I get my car back under control and get it onto the shoulder of the road with no further incident.

I called Candice (because in addition to being my GPS, she’s now my honorary On Star system) and then 911. They strap me down (backboard, neck brace, the works) and ambulance me over to the hospital in El Dorado, KS. (And here, if I were Deb, I imagine I’d be making a joke about how TO is somehow to blame for this.).

They X-Ray me and leave me in the extremely frelling uncomfortable neck brace until the X-Rays confirm I’m not mangled or busted up. I took a heck of a beating to the neck and back but nothing worse than some extremely painful bruising and muscle pulls/sprains. So they front me some pain pills, a script for more pills, and the cops, after informing me that I hit a patch of black ice on what was becoming a rather crash filled night along that stretch, drop me at a local Best Western along with another guy who had some similar fun on the ice. Only that guy did a 30 ft ROLL off of 35/The Turnpike all the way onto a service road 30 feet below. And he walked away without so much as a scratch or muscle pull. Someone upstairs was watching out for that guy.

I called the insurance company the next day. Long story short…..$15,000 in damages to the left wheel and engine. Le Total Loss.

After recovering from my injuries and spending what seemed like ever on the phone with the insurance world, grabbed a rental, cleaned out my car, and headed home. It could have been a lot worse, I suppose.

I was going to say in my original post that 2007 was the year I made The Leap. Got my car, moved out on my own, made huge strides in the building a life department. Well, if this was the year I made the Leap, November and December was a 4 floor crash landing. Emergency appendix surgery (that killed off a return trip home to a Xmas party where I would have been able to see a number of my old friends), followed by totaling my less-than-a-year-old first car and all the fun that entailed, and now I have to figure out how to get a new car before it’s time to return my rental. Oh, and to top all that off, I missed two of my last three workdays this year and because of this, I missed hitting the monthly production goal on emails by less than 30 emails. Hitting that goal, which I would have done easily with those two days I was out, would have netted me a $300 bonus.

2007 was the best of years, and it was the worst of years. Especially at the end. I hope to build on the many successes of this year and God willing, not be carried into any hospitals.

Happy New Year.

By Rob, January 4, 2008, 12:03 am o'clock

From the original home of the Safe House, this here Rob, wishing You and Yours a very happy and very safe Christmas Holiday! Merry Christmas! And for those of you that don’t celebrate Christmas and those of you in the PC Nazi “We can’t say Christmas!” Guild, Happy Holidays!

This year has been a very interesting one as moving away from the family has highlighted their importance to me. Don’t ever take the ones you love for granted.

May your holidays be happy, safe, filled with love, joy, family, and of course, lots of righteous presents!

By Rob, December 24, 2007, 7:23 pm o'clock

Greetings, good people of Blog Nation! I have healed up from my surgery well and have returned to work. Still a little sore, but living free and dieing hard and all that good stuff. (I just got that DVD from Netflix.).

-I forgot to mention two important events in the last blog. The first was that on the way to the doctor’s office (which would turn into the hospital and my surgery), I was talking to Candice and I got lost. So she used Google Maps on her cell phone to help me find the place. I just got a kick out of the fact Candice, in Texas, was acting as my GPS in Kansas. That’s a good system!

-The second event was that my younger brother is now officially a father! Joshua Harris was born last week. For those of you keeping score at home, yes, that’s officially the sixth sign of the apocalypse. Be afraid….

The Xmas presents, for the most part, have been bought as well. Tis the season.

And I’ll be heading home to Texas on the 20th. So my next blog will likely come from the ORIGINAL home of the Safe House! I’m sure you all are dying with anticipation. :)

Oh, and there’s this….

————–

BUSINESS AS USUAL FOR THE F.W. YAKS

Associated Press

FORT WORTH, TEXAS - For the Fort Worthless Yaks, Sunday’s win over Mike Dupin’s The Champs was business as usual. Despite a less than stellar lifetime record against Mike Dupin teams, including a loss in the Jacksux III bowl in 2006, the Yaks earned their 4th consecutive trip to the championship game with a 40 point win.

Team owner Rob T credited his GM and scouting staff for the continued excellence of the Yaks. “We picked up Willie Parker in his first year - got Gates in his second year before everyone knew he was good. Colston really blew us away when we took a chance on him last year. This year, we were able to find Ryan Grant and several other valuable contributers in the late season on the wire. Continually discovering that guy, the one that’s about to be the next great fantasy star, has been one of the biggest reasons for this sustained run.”

Now, the only thing standing in the way of the Yaks and their third championship ring in 4 years is best friend and Donald Faison impersonator Butch Rosser, whose Boondock Saints have earned their first ever championship shot in the storied 6 year history of the Jacksux League.

Rosser was unavailable for comment, but we heard cackling about “crush Rob….celebrate with Golden Goose” coming from behind a residence door believed to be Rosser’s.

Lifetime counting playoffs, Butch Rosser teams are 2-12 against the Yaks and other Rob T-coached teams, with the first win coming last year late in the 2006 season. But the Yaks are taking this challenge seriously.

“We are preparing for this like it’s any other championship team. Butch Rosser has made great strides in managing his teams, earning his first playoff appearance last year and defeating the Yaks for the first time during the regular season. This is going to be a dogfight.”

Rob paused and returned to the microphone. “Not that kind of dogfight. And there is no truth to the rumors that Butch Rosser was involved in Mike Vick’s dogfighting operation. Absolutely none. We have been assured by Frustration Inc, Butch Rosser’s agent, that all those dead dogs buried behind Butch’s place were planted and that Butch looks forward to clearing his good name.”

“But just in case, root for the Yaks on Sunday!”

By Rob, December 17, 2007, 12:40 pm o'clock

Sorry about the month between posts. GTR.com - it updates on the full moons! :)

It just seems so crazy how, given how noneventful my life is, how busy it still keeps me. Oh, and there was the little thing of having to have my appendix taken out on Monday, so I didn’t feel like being at the PC too much lately. Compared to the surgery of 2005, it was a small thing : I should be back at work next week, and I’m already sitting down and doing all the usual things with only minor stabbing pain. God bless laparoscopic surgery.

In Memory: Redskins safety Sean Taylor (24), who was shot to death in what is looking more and more like a senseless burglary gone horribly wrong, and legendary daredevil Evel Knievel passed away at the age of 69. Two of the best in their respective businesses - one lost in his prime, one finally going after a legendary life.

Regarding the new purpose, I have, on the suggestions of good friends, given up the white bread. (This is where, assuming I were cutting edge and interesting enough to do a podcast, Butch would jump in with some kind of whitey joke. I’m almost sure of it.) and made other small changes to the diet. Sodas have been a thing of the past completely as of the last week plus and I’ve only had like, 3 or 4 total in the last month.

Baby steps, I know, but you don’t conquer something like this in a day.

Movie Reviews! I got a heaping helping of them. (I should organize these into their own section someday. Maybe I will.)

American Gangster: After what Denzel did with ‘Training Day’, I was psyched to see this. And it did not disappoint. The likeable but evil vibe he mastered in Training Day he amped up to likeable but cold blooded psycho. Russell Crowe turned in a pretty good “please give me an Oscar!” performance as well, and the writing and details were superb. Of course, when it’s based on a true story, the writing isn’t that hard. It was a three hour movie..but you can make a movie three hours long if you’ve got the story and actors to support it. ****3/4 on the RVD scale. Tremendous movie.

Fred Claus: I had high hopes for this as well. And don’t get me wrong, Vince Vaughn turned in his usual ranting hilarious performance, and Paul Giamatti did an excellent job as the overhelpful, loving older brother/Santa trying to keep things going. They even dusted off Kevin Spacey as the villian/efficiency expert in a neat cameo. There was just something missing from it. It felt kinda like it needed an Owen Wilson to be the foil to Vaughn’s Vaughn act. Without that sidekick voice, it was just Vaughn reprising some of his less raunchy stuff from Crashers. The dialogue, even for a Christmas movie, was waaay over the top. YMMV, but I can’t recommend it. **1/2

The Departed: This would be another gangster-type flick that came out in 2006, starring Leo Titantic as a street youth turned undercover cop inside the mob, Matt Damon as a mob informer inside the police, Jack Nicholson stirring the pot as evil gangster bob extraordinary, and even more star-studded secondaries (Mark Walhberg and Martin Sheen as the main good cops, Alec Baldwin, etc). Usually, when you throw this many names and egos into the hat, you either have a instant classic or a mess on your hands (see the Ocean’s Eleven series for example of both sides of that scale.). Extremely well-written, jumping between perspectives of the two “moles”, and everyone was pretty much on their A-Game. Nicholson’s performance was excellent - and his was probably the weakest. When you can say that about a movie…yeah. Unless you’re allergic to violence, Highly, highly recommended. *****

Which reminds me….dammit, I don’t like liking Leo DiCaprio. I watched him in Titanic and despised him. Funny how Martin Scorsese keeps managing to make a real actor out of DiC (Scorsese’s 2002 epic, Gangs of New York, another excellent movie, also starred Leo.). I’d say only watch Leo in Scorsese movies..but ‘Catch Me If You Can’ is another excellent movie. Of course, he’d have to have been trying to make that movie bad (Spielberg directing, the immortal Tom Hanks in one of his best ever performances as a foil, Walken while he still had some mental faculties as the mentor crook dad - seriously, you really have to suck to bomb a movie with that kind of talent around you).

Grrr. I still don’t like the pretty boy. Something about him just irritates me. Moving on…

The Guardian: Ashton Kutcher is a cocky Coast Guard rescue swimmer wannabe being taught the job by super legendary rescue swimmer as played by Kevin Costner. Clancy Brown (of Shawshank Redemption fame as Captain Hadley, captain of the guards) is also, ironically enough (intentionally named?) Captain William Hadley in this movie, though he doesn’t shoot anybody this time out. The good about this movie: decent writing, excellent performance by Costner, Brown and Neal McDonough support Costner well and for the topic material, probably a much better movie than it had any right to be. The bad: Ashton Kutcher. I know, I know, I’m probably biased, but Kutcher as a rescue swimmer is about as believable as me as a wannabe Mr. Universe or Rosser as an anti-pornography crusader. Plus, he just doesn’t do “hot” scenes well - they have all the chemistry of a speed dating meet. Which is a shame since Melissa Sagemiller is quite the cutie. Decent movie in spite of him - I think this could have been ***** with a Kutcher replacement. ***

That’s all the time we’ve got for today, kids. Take it easy!

By Rob, December 1, 2007, 12:45 am o'clock

A few months ago, on the Colbert Report, Stephen Colbert somehow rooked “Papa Bear” Bill O’Reilly into coming on his show. Truly, this was one of the greater moments of the Colbert era, surpassed only by Colbert’s superb speech at a show actually attended by Bush himself.

Colbert opened his show by saying, “It was the mission of this show to get Bill O’Reilly to appear.”

What does this have to do with me, you ask?

Just a few months after I opened this blog, a goal was set. That goal was to be on my own. Almost three years later…

Mission accomplished!

You may have noticed I’ve been pretty absent of late. Heavy work schedule, the chaos of settling in, etc. A lot of things caused it. But I think one of the reasons why is that I really didn’t have a purpose anymore. The driving goal I’d been working towards for a long time had been achieved.

It’s time for a new mission.

My new goal: to get in shape. It’s little secret that I’m out of shape and other goals have left this very important issue unaddressed. It also works hand in hand with one of my longer-term goals as well.

So here it is: my goal is to lose 60 lbs in one year. 11/02/2008. Lean, mean, Rob-tacular machine.

One of the things that the last few years have taught me is that if I’m patient and motivated, there is nothing I can’t beat. I got a car despite the hurdles. I managed to go from unemployed to a high value Sprint employee with good chances for advancing. I have God and some of the best friends a guy could ever hope for on my side.

The new mission is set. And I will achieve it. WHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

————-
Fantasy Report

(Jacksux 4, Ft. Worthless Yaks, 7-1, 1st place) - Matt mentioned that he has more points than me. He’s not the only one. In fact, I’d be ranked 8th if we were going solely by points. But we’re not. :-) Snuck by Charlie 112-108 when Deshaun Wynn didn’t play Monday night in Green Bay to keep the streak alive. Whew!

(Rage Football, Lenexa Lugnuts, 5-3, 4th place) - survived 4 starters on bye with a 108-106 victory. Fruit basket was duly sent to LDT.

————-
Random Notes:

Candice got promoted to Workforce Management at Sprint. Congratulations! Now you can carry coffee for the schedulers!

Got a haircut today. Muargh.

As part of my new healthier me, the groceries I purchased included soup and no hamburgers. The available flavors of Campbell’s Chunky soup astound me. And also some of them sound like they were named by the people who name crayons. “Super Sirloin Burger.” “Tremendous Turkey Potpie”. Et al.

I also saw, and I kid you not, Weight Watchers Cookie Dough for making cookies. I’m sure it’s good for you and all and they have some sort of secret no-fat cookie something, but it, much like the peanut butter and jelly mixed together jars, is just wrong as a concept.

While I’m rambling about grocery minutiae, how does one store sell milk for 3.09 and a store that’s two miles away from Store A sell the exact same gallon of milk for 4.69? We saw something like this with the gas prices for a while the year the gas companies decided to get really greedy, but even with gas, you didn’t see another station a mile away with gas almost $2 more expensive.

Price Chopper IS EVIL.

That is all.

By Rob, November 2, 2007, 4:56 pm o'clock